Taking action
Recently someone asked me, what if I have client who engages me as a counselor for help to combat their addictions/bad habits but the person is very resistant. What do I do?
This is what I said:
Everyone is resistant to change, and everyone on some level enjoys the pain and suffering when they are hooked to their addictions. But if the client has taken the first step to come for counseling, I say congratulations.
However, there are some clients who are happy to just talk about their addictions but have no real desire to work on mastering their addictions by getting into action. In fact, they may be looking for justification for why they are still hanging on to their addictions. They may even argue and place blame on others. I normally 'fire' these clients after a period of time, because they have no real desire to help themselves. Ultimately for any coaching/counseling to work the client has to do the work, and I cannot do the work for him/her. I am only the coach cheering and guiding at the sidelines.
Some people may say that when I 'fire' the client, then I am leaving the client on the lurch and don't I feel guilty? My reply to that is, they were already in that state before they came to me. So I hold no responsibility for them not getting into action. Co-dependence with the client is not my cup of tea.
So taking responsibility for yourself is a big part of healing. If you have been thinking about making the change for yourself, get into action NOW or else you will never do it.
© 2009